Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
I did not marry a roomba.
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