look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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