woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I want to fling myself into the sun
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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