he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize