He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
That accounts for only three of the penises
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
