i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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