I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize