He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
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