People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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