it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize