just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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