Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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