Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
