Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
