This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Randomize
