glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Randomize