You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
It's blow job season.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
