He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
