I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Randomize
