Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
