I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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