My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
