So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
there was a trapeze. enough said
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
