Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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