currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
My dick has a subreddit
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
