I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
