Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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