she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
