is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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