ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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