he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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