He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
