you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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