How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
