My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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