He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
