Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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