He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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