he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Randomize
