This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
