Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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