i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
