I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Please don't give away my fajitas
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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