My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
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