are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
