who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
