He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
