Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
