Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Randomize
