Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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